Kuwait

So I'm trying to get back into the swing of blogging. I've been very busy with work and have tried to encourage Laurel to keep up with the blog, but she failed me.

So in my grand attempt to get back into blogging I'll start with a short little story about people watching.

I enjoy people watching, who doesn't. I once told a friend of mind I could get paid to people watch and be completely content. So I was in the Kuwaiti airport chillin at costa coffee killing time before we boarded. From behind me I heard a distinct American accent. From only hearing the voice I could tell it was a big black American in his early 40's. He was apparently on the phone with someone who didn't know him very well. In his conversation I learned he was a defense contractor in some capacity, although he never said that directly. I know this because he said he was shot in Afghanistan a year ago and has since put on 40kilos and won't be going back to the field any time soon. I also learned the name of the company he worked for and that he was heading to Thailand from Bahrain. As we got up to board the plane I got up only to realize he was wearing the normal Kuwaiti garb without the headress. I guess this was in attempt to blend in with his surroundings. So the coworker and I board the plane, like a good little employee I booked economy since the flight was less than 4 hrs in duration. As I finally get situated from directing Indians to there correct seats, you can't get too mad when realizing a lot of people around you aren't literate. So I finally get situated grab my book and settle in for a short 50 min. flight.

When who do I see waddling down the aisle? That's right the loud phone talker from Costa Coffee. As he tries to settle in to his seat, which of course was near me, I learned yet even more from my fellow American. First off, i feel it's important to tell you how huge this guy was, his belly almost touched the seat in front of him and he was only about 6'. And the poor guy was clearly self conscious about the extra pounds judging from his 3 different references to his own weight to the gents sitting next to him. So while on the plane he actually makes 3 phone calls. To some of which he uses words like operation such and such was not what we expected. And in 2 of his convo's he mix some english and spanish. And from the little espanol I know it seemed he was only repeating himself. He then proceeds to tell some person on the phone to not send Jake to Kuwait, that it's a horrible place to do business and he'll be back to Afghanistan and then tells the story again about getting shot and gaining weight. He then proceeds to tell the same person how his guys are not working for the Brits and how he hates doing business with them. In another convo he calls someone to tell them he'll call them in Bahrain on his Satellite phone. Why not wait 50 minutes and make 1 phone call? I do not know. And just to be sure he has the sat. phone he takes it out of his bag, which is a huge ordeal because this guy can't bend down to get his bag under the seat in front of him because of his shear massiveness. At this point the whole thing seems like a huge charade. He continues with his loud antics and insulting the country he's currently in all while on the phone in the plane after he'd been asked to but his phone away. At this point I'm thinking this guy is a liar and desperatly attempting to bait someone into conversation. Well to his demise I imagine no one around him spoke english confidently enough to engage in conversation.

From what I know about defense contractors majority of those guys do a great job of staying under the radar. I feel like if I wanted to I'd be able to find this dude any where in the world. Which I'd like to point out the obvious and say that is the opposite of what these guys would like to have happen. When we landed, sure enough he was on the phone again being his loud self.

And that's the tale of the worst undercover American defense contractor pretending to be Kuwaiti.